One of the things I find most interesting about how the digital age how the way we curate, connect and meet relationship and dating prospects has completely shifted. The ideal of girl meets boy in some love-at-first-sight/incredibly romantic way went out the window years ago forcing singletons throughout the universe to seek alternate methods….
…and enter online dating.
And I’d like to consider myself hip-to-the-beat when it comes to the online dating landscape (or at least as hip as you can get pouring over article after article about it and not actually using it, well, except for that one time), but a few weeks ago I was out with some of my friends for a ladies’ night extravaganza when the conversation turned to the New York dating scene.
Girlfriend all over every dating site ever: I just find it really taxing to go on so many dates every.single.week. You’d think with all of the guys in New York, one of these dating sites would caveat it with ‘don’t sign up if you’re a total jerkface.’
Girlfriend on a couple dating sites: I’d have to assume they’d lose their complete database then.
Girlfriend who probably has never even accidentally landed on a dating site: Come on, girls, it can’t possibly be THAT bad.
Me: Well then, what’s the alternative? I guess I’d assume I’d rather know what I’m getting in to in advance, well most of the time, than the random bar guy. Online dating in my mind is a bit more romantic than divey bar dude.
GAOEDSE: That’s because you romanticize online dating.
Me: I do NOT. Okay, well maybe a little. I just find it so interesting.
GOACDS: Then why don’t you actually try it.
Me smirking in response: Ehhh, sounds like a lot of work.
Then, as girls in technology and communications so often do, we broke the silence by pulling out our iPhones, and after a few minutes, GOACDS spoke.
GOACDS: Sooo, I just hit up OKC locals, and I caught one! He said he’s on his way over in a few minutes.
Me: OKC locals?
Clearly I’m not that hip-to-the-online-dating beat.
Exasperated by my ignorance, GAOEDSE responded: Ugh, Jess. Ok Cupid Locals. It’s gives a little bit more context to a casual meetup, because they only serve up people that are recommended matches, AND close to you. And you have to turn on the radar to opt in to it.
The next day I downloaded the app to get a better understanding of what this “Locals” thing was all about.
I’ll admit, I was a little shocked by what this application was capable of procuring. Basically immediate “dating” gratification, and nicely packaging it with the idea that this person I can source (nearly instantly) may have commonalities?
Talk about stepping away from the old romance method. I knew almost instantly this wasn’t the kind of interaction with the opposite gender that I was after, so don’t try and track me down on the OKC Locals scene any time soon.
I guess the truth is, as much as I idolize the online dating scene, I’m still an old-school romantic at heart and I think I’m finally starting to realize that there is not an app for that.
OMG, great post! I can “imagine” that was probably a very interesting conversation…and your girlfriends must be so cool (and they are lucky to have such an insightful homie).
Hahah, I didn’t even know that OKC had a “locals” app, but it totally makes sense, and my girlfriends who are, incidentally, rather obsessed with the site, will be happy to hear that.
Personally, I generally had very good experiences with OKC (not so much with other dating sites), but I think that was largely based on the fact that I wasn’t expecting to settle down right away with any of the guys I met, I was just looking for someone (attractive) to hang out with. I met some really interesting/nice guys that I never would have met otherwise, but eventually going out on a date every night of the week took it’s toll- I ran out of energy and other life events took over.
I’ve recommended it to all my single girlfriends ever since though, and have enjoyed hearing their mixed adventures.
Well, we at Why They’re Single are in the business of rounding up and showcasing all the douchiest, jerkface-most boneheads (of both genders) in one place, for your voyeuristic pleasure (and horror).
Just in case you get too romantic about online dating.