There used to be a time when you could break up with someone, and you could keep it under wraps while you deal with the emotional side and heal privately. You got to chose when you told friends, and not them finding out before you (because your significant other clicked “cancel relationship” on Facebook to let you know things are over). Broadcast to your network and open to their commentary. It’s become nearly impossible to have a “private” life if you actively engage in social networks. Take this example I found in my newsfeed this morning:
The openness of social networks, emotions stream in real time. Salt to the wound. Shame on you, Andria, bad form.
Emotions are rubbed raw in other networks. FourSquare’s check-ins and ping updates can notify you when your crush checks in to a romantic restaurant with a member of the opposite sex after they’ve told you that they’re going home to rest (if you’re crushing on someone, I strongly recommend for your sanity that you shut off the ping updates). Or perhaps you expose yourself to your network by tweeting out links to emo songs.
If you see me tweet this….you know what’s up.
So what do you do you do when you go through an emotional experience online? Block and unfriend the folks that offend? Delete your networks entirely? Go on hiatus?
How do you deal with the insensitivity and the exposure of the Web?
I’ll admit, I’m mostly a Craigslist hater. It just always seemed so shady, and every experience whether it was selling furniture (like my bed which is probably one of the saddest stories you’ve ever heard so I’ll spare you the details) or looking for roommates, it was just always….well subpar.
When I moved to New York, I was absolutely overwhelmed with the idea of scoping out an apartment on foot, I could certainly get a sense of what neighborhoods that I thought would fit, but to find something in my price range, with roommates (believe it or not I actually want roommates), and with the amenities that I need would be hard without asking Craig what was up. So after responding to more than 50 postings (which is probably underestimating) and looking at 15 of those locations, Craigslist was making it’s way over to my own _____ list. So overwhelming, so unfun, and so discouraging. But I kept looking, hoping Craig would prove me wrong. I accepted the price tags, the size, the potential grocery store hassle. I tried to keep an open mind, which I think is required for Craigslisting.
Yesterday I schedule appointments with 4 apartments, and after the first viewing (of an apartment that looked like it came straight out of the scariest episode of CSI you’ve EVER seen) I wanted to cry. But, I heading to the second viewing in the East Village. And that’s where Craig threw me a curveball and I found it, perfection.
A gem in the East Village, with great facilities, incredible roommates who are working really cool jobs, and Susan (my cat) friendly! Total win. I move in Feb 1, and I’ll be compiling a housewarming list of items for you viewing/purchasing pleasure. Justttttt kidding.
Anyway, I’m sorry, Craig, for being such a cynic. I’ll keep you in mind, because it looks like I’m going to need new furniture.
What about you, good/bad Craigslist experiences? Is there another service you use to sell/buy your stuff online?
It’s hard to go anywhere without being inundated with placards, posters, t-shirts or signs that proudly proclaim on business storefronts “follow me on twitter.” Just seems a little too passive and a lot too vain for me.
As a social media marketer, believe me, I get it. There is perceived value to the number of followers/fans that businesses can brag they have, and it does provide a potential in road to activation/engagement.
I'll be honest, I own these.
In my new position I’ve been charged to build a “social media strategy” for large consumer brands from the ground up. Any social media “guru” may tell you that starting a Facebook page and Twitter account, and then linking those sites to the main Web page would fit the bill…
…but I’m inclined to disagree. The solution is NOT the same for every brand/business/person. That’s tactical and short sighted. I’m not interested in social media’s short-term benefits. I’m looking for a something more long-term. I want to help the brands I support become social.
Activate and engage. And through it, build evangelism. Of course, different brands will have different audiences and that means the strategy has to adjust accordingly.
In planning stages assess the needs of clients, products, and services. Pair traditional public relations efforts and outreach, with consumer engagement and social media. Traditional media is used to raise broad awareness, consumer engagement (through actual real life engagement, or what I refer to as socialization) to build brand ambassadors and THEN you can utilize social media as a way to observe and engage consumer feedback and criticism.
The strongest return on social media is evangelism.
That personal interaction is what I’m striving to achieve for the brands I’m fortunate enough to represent. Real life socialization is my top priority. Social media is just a way to for a brand (or me) to keep in touch with evangelists until the next time we get together.
Think about brands you advocate. Are you an evangelist simply because you’re a fan of their facebook page or because of you follow them on twitter? Or was it a personal experience with the brand that strengthened/built your relationship?
After attending my first official New York City Social Media Mixer last night (Digital Somethings at Roger Smith Hotel), it got me thinking – I’m really bad at meeting people.
It’s not that I don’t engage. It’s not that I don’t have conversations, or feel a connection with a lot of wonderful people at social functions. My problem is that I don’t ask questions. I spend way too much time talking about myself. Surprise, huh? A social media/public relations person who is a little too self-involved?
When a friend asked me last night what someone (who I had been talking to for more than 15 minutes) did for a living, I couldn’t believe my answer.
Me: “I honestly have no idea.”
My friend: “Really? You were talking with them for an awfully long time.”
Me: “Huh, gosh, that sucks. No, literally no idea, maybe something in social media?”
MF: While laughing, “You mean like everyone else here? What was there name/twitter name, you could probably look it up.”
Me: “You know, I have no idea. None. I spent the entire time talking about myself. Wow, that sucks. I suck.”
MF: ……
I’m not going to lie to you, when I realized it; I was a little thrown off. How could I be so self-centered? How could I not be asking more questions? And although I’ve always been known for being a connector, it seems like it’s happening more and more that I have no idea what people do for a living or what they enjoy.
The last thing I want to do is live the stereotype (and forgive me, but we all know it’s true) of being a self-centric social marketing flack. That’s just so passé. So 2009. So here’s how I’m planning to fix it in 2010 – my “how to” meet people:
Spend more time looking at and engaging in conversation with people I meet, and less time looking at my phone and tweeting who I’m meeting. Stop using my iPhone as a crutch/defensive mechanism.
Say their name throughout the conversation so I can remember. Or get a card (which I’ll be honest with you I hhhattteeeeeee business cards because of the one time I poked myself in the eye with one, but that’s another story) and write something unique about them on the back. For example, “Billy <3s comics, hates gardening.”
Ask what they do and think of someone in my network that they could benefit from and vice versa. Try to make an introduction (which means I’d have to get their information).
Schedule time in my week (like Tuesdays at 8 am) to follow up with the people I met that week.
What about you, is it something you struggle with? How do you make sure you remember people/connect with them later? Are you spending time asking questions/listening or are you just talking?
Sometimes I get to a point where I can’t clear my head, and it effects every part of my life. It prevents me from sleeping. Eating. Laughing. Learning. Growing. Thinking. Even makes me have trouble breathing as more and more e-mails/DMs/IMs/texts/voicemails go unchecked. Information overload to the MAX.
I’ve reached this point before, but unfortunately last time around I didn’t get enough online housekeeping taken care of, so it was only a matter of time before I ended back here again. I partially blame my lag time on the cross country move, the holidays and starting a new job (which I acknowledge all as major things). But even taking all of that into consideration, I have to believing working in the social media and public relations space, I mount myself with way more information that the average American.
According to LukeW Ideation and Design (which I totally didn’t look into the validity of the source because that would have required me to do research and digest more information, so take this information and do with it what you will PLUS it’s from October 2009, so it’s old school by now anyway) the average Data Consumption for an American is:
The average American consumes 34 gigabytes of content and 100,000 words (cross our eyes and ears) of information in a single day. (source)
So what do I do? I mean, I’ve been here before? How do I ensure that I won’t be back here, breathless and confused, in just a few short weeks? Where do I cut back?
While I don’t know this is the best approach here’s what I’m going to try to help clear my mind:
1. File my freaking e-mail. I have 1603 e-mails that are eagerly awaiting my review, most of which (let’s be honest), I’m never going to look at. So setting up more filters nowwww….and done.
2. Block some of those dadgum applications on Facebook. I seriously can’t look at one more Farmville notification. I mean, like for real.
3. Setting up more lists on my Twitter stream. While I was inspired by my friend Micah’s post about unfollowing folks that aren’t contributing to your needs, I’m of the belief that I followed those folks at some point for some reason, so I’ll just keep them there for awhile. At least until they say something to prove otherwise. Beware.
4. Better regiment my daily blog/news reading. Which will probably require paying attention to my RSS reader at some point. Oh man, that’s going to be a huge undertaking…..maybe that will wait.
5. Spend more time focusing on the things that I’m interested in or could have an impact on my clients/profession later on. I give up a lot of time online reading articles that I don’t find interesting, and don’t provide me with skills to grow. Probably how many of you are feeling about this blog post right now.
Okay, so, I’m going to get through this right? I’m going to regroup and skinny the info down at some point, yes?…Please…help?
So as I mentioned to you a few weeks ago, that I was taking a position with Digitas in New York and I’m happy to say that I started this Tuesday as a Senior Associate working on some incredible consumer brands, that I’m super jazzed about.
This is more specifically exciting for a few reasons:
I get to spend a lot of time delving into the social media strategy space, which I love. Building social metrics and strategy and braiding into a larger marketing mix – my dream job!
I am getting to explore the space, take time to find out what digital practices will provide positive impact for these great brands. I’m looking forward to navigating the space and I’ll share what I learn along the way.
The team I’m working with is incredibly smart, and the agency has some incredible clients and smart minds on the roster. I cannot wait to learn, grow and explore with them.
I have ALWAYS wanted to live and work in New York City! w00t!
Here’s a quick peek at my 10th floor lobby. Swanky, huh?
I’ll be sure to keep you looped in as the j-o-b progresses (I already have two business trips coming up this month…one of which will include my first trip to Vegas!)…so stay tuned and wish me luck!
Thank you all for your support throughout this transition, I couldn’t do it without you!
I’ve always loved the idea of New Year’s. It’s your chance to wipe your life clean, and resolve to start fresh and shake things up with a new diet plan or gym regiment. I love new years because of the hope that it provides, and the idea that we as people can evolve and change. And regardless of how many years in a row that we don’t make it past the 21 days that it actually takes to form a habit, we still convince ourselves that this year will be different, this year we’ll stick with it, this year we’re going to change.
Last year after going through an exceptionally hard break up and a rocky end of year, I was finally able (and/or motivated enough) to hold tight to a resolution for the first time in my life. I resolved to trust instinct. Something that is so seemingly simple, but admittedly up until 2009, it had always been extremely difficult for me. I second guessed everything and doubted everything. But making the resolution to trust myself gave me the best year of my life. In 2009 I traveled more, received more opportunity than ever before, made more close friends than I could have ever imagined, and I made some great decisions.
Thanks to trusting instinct and my 2009 resolution, I moved to New York on January 1, 2010 to kick off a new chapter of my life. But this new chapter still requires some resolve — and this year, I’m resolving to keep up with the ‘09 trusting instinct, but I’m going to take it a step further. In 2010, I’m never going to allow myself to ask, “What if?” I’m going enjoy each choice I make, and accept each one as an opportunity to grow and evolve. 2010 will be a great year of learning, one where I hope to learn from each of you.
What about you? Where would you like to improve (and/or resolve)? What is your hope for 2010 and how will you ensure that it happens?
Last night, Seattle’s 107.7 The End’s twitter account stepped into what I’d consider unforgiveable territory, they profiled and discriminated.
But it wasn’t just that tweet. They argued back and forth with their followers about their beliefs. Here’s more of the conversation:
The station claims their account was hacked, and they do not agree with the sentiments, and have since removed the tweets. Not sure I believe that claim, but as a PR professional that runs client twitter accounts, that scares the hell out of me. Could something like this destroy a brand? What impact will it have on the radio station? What can brands do to protect themselves, or how would you react if the same happened to you?
I used to love the angst of dating. I used to love waiting for the phone call, or the nervousness of being asked out by my crush in person. The in class note pass, and watching them blush as I unfolded the paper to see, “Would you like to go out with me?”
I loved the vulnerability of it all. It made dating so personal. And then…the Internet…okay, that was around when I first starting dating, who am I kidding. But, in the last couple years it’s become more acceptable to be less personal about the initial ask (which gets rid of that nervous angst that I loved so much).
It’s not like I’ve been asked out often, but the few times I’ve been approached over the past couple years, it’s been behind the protective wall of social media. Enter the Facebook ask out:
Meet Joey. Joey, a seemingly nice guy, I met last night out with friends. He asked to friend me on Facebook, which I obliged. We talked for quite some time last night, at which point he could have asked in person, “Jessica, would you like to catch a movie?” Instead, this. Why, Joey, why?
Ironically enough, the two men I’ve asked out in my life (both of which rejected me), I’ve asked out as impersonally as possible.
The first was in 7th grade, when I left my crush a note in his locker that said something supremely awkward like, “Please don’t show this to anyone,” which of course he did, “but would you like to go out with me? Check yes or no and drop in my locker number 840. – Jessica Randazza”Awwkkkwaaarrdd. Steven didn’t say yes, and like I said, he told everyone about my note, which made it real life. It made it vulnerable, and it embarrassed me for a very long time. Impersonal for the time period, but real life evidence of the ask.
The second happened a few months ago. There was the cuuutteessssst guy in the advertising department at work that I saw sporadically at beer Fridays, and I asked the receptionist for his name. Twestival was coming up, and I knew he worked in digital advertising and was semi-interested in social media. So, I found him in the work database and sent him an interoffice instant message.
Me: Hi there, I work upstairs in PR. [simultaneously I added him as a friend on Facebook]
Cute Ad Guy: Hey. [friend request accepted]
Me: Um, so, have you heard about Twestival? It’s this weekend, and I have an extra ticket. http://seattle.twestival.com/
CAG: Oh, cool, yeah. Sounds cool. No thanks. [Cute Ad Guy is no longer online]
While I saw CAG several times after that, I felt like I could delete it from my mind as quickly as I could “X”out the IM. No real life evidence, unlike Steven. Ego in tact.
So back to Joey. What could he have done to make his ask more interesting (besides nixing the “Holla.”)? When I asked my friend, Micah Baldwin, he laughed and directed me to Gawker’s First Move Chart:
Note the asterisk. While I don’t necessarily agree with it, is that the expectation? By accepting his friendship on Facebook, did I open myself (or should I expect, rather) this level of casual interaction? And while it says cell call is the best option, how often does it happen with the ease/protection of today’s social media lifestyle?
I’ve always struggled with cutting myself slack and learning to accept my mistakes by taking each one as a learning opportunity. Typically in reaction to major errors, I knee jerk and lose control…which inevitably means I make more mistakes. I call it cyclical suffering, which feels like the adult version of teen angst.
After my most recent “cyclical suffering” attack endured longer than usual, I headed over to my favorite coffee shop to try take a step back. I sat there with my laptop open (iChat, Gchat, Tweetdeck, Facebook, work/personal e-mail all running), my iPhone abuzz with text messages, and blaring music, and asked myself: Why did it seem that errors were occurring more frequently, and the cycles lasting longer? What lesson did I not seem to be learning!?
Then, when another IM popped up on my screen (in addition to the six already in progress), it hit me hard. Burying my shame with information overload/work was NOT going to solve my problem. I needed recovery time and spend some time alone thinking about how I could learn from my mishaps. No amount of IM convos or blogs were going to help end the cycle, I needed to get there myself.
After realizing the solution was so simple, I slammed my laptop shut and headed out to my car. Threw my computer and iPhone in my trunk (because it’s the only way I can’t use it while driving, and yes, I am that addicted) and began to meander through Seattle. The tension in my shoulders and neck melted, it had been days since the cycle started, and only minutes since I disconnected. Life off the grid helped me find the clarity I needed.
Life is learning. It only gets sweeter with major life lessons. Accept and move on.
Have you ever felt engulfed in flames due to a few of life’s lessons? What did you do to get back on track?
Hope everyone is wrapping up their Monday pleasantly, I'm going to finish up with a good book (real, not Kindle-fied). Have a great night! 29 minutes ago
The station claims their account was hacked, and they do not agree with the sentiments, and have since removed the tweets. Not sure I believe that claim, but as a PR professional that runs client twitter accounts, that scares the hell out of me. Could something like this destroy a brand? What impact will it have on the radio station? What can brands do to protect themselves, or how would you react if the same happened to you?
Meet Joey. Joey, a seemingly nice guy, I met last night out with friends. He asked to friend me on Facebook, which I obliged. We talked for quite some time last night, at which point he could have asked in person, “Jessica, would you like to catch a movie?” Instead, this. Why, Joey, why? 
Note the asterisk. While I don’t necessarily agree with it, is that the expectation? By accepting his friendship on Facebook, did I open myself (or should I expect, rather) this level of casual interaction? And while it says cell call is the best option, how often does it happen with the ease/protection of today’s social media lifestyle?
Then, when another IM popped up on my screen (in addition to the six already in progress), it hit me hard. Burying my shame with information overload/work was NOT going to solve my problem. I needed recovery time and spend some time alone thinking about how I could learn from my mishaps. No amount of IM convos or blogs were going to help end the cycle, I needed to get there myself.